What Say You

Tell me there is no God and I will look at you and say, "You just don't get it."

You are blinded by the gods of this age, blinded by your self-conceived notion of logic that unless the light of Jesus Christ reaches you, unless you come to fully understand love, you will never understand how I can believe in God (2 Corinthians 4:3-6).

You do not know the week I have had struggling with my depressed sense of self-worth, listening to the lies of loneliness and despair I thought were behind me.  Culminating to Friday night and Saturday where broken I kneeled before God begging Him to deliver me.  Begging Him to accept me as I am.  Through love God already did.

Allow me to explain to you that there are no coincidences in life.  As I was struggling with my self-worth, I came across a movie last night on Netflix called "Ragamuffin" based on the life of country music artist Rich Mullins.  Rich Mullins has always been a favorite singer of mine.  His songs are authentic and after watching his biography I can now understand where he was writing his songs from.  He was writing from a perspective that he was not perfect.  He was broken.  He struggled with his demons.  He wanted to be loved.  He wanted to be better.  Finally, Rich Mullins realized that God loved him just the way he was.  I watched this movie and cried silently for I was seeing my own life displayed on the screen before me.

Rich Mullins was a student of Brennan Manning who wrote "The Ragamuffin Gospel".  I listened to Brennan Manning this morning on the way to church talk about God loving us the way we are and not as we should be.  Here I am struggling with my own self-worth, beating myself up once more this past week for my past sins which God has wiped clean already.  Feeling guilty for my failures and struggles this past week.  Forgetting that God still loves me.  He doesn't expect me to be perfect.  He expects me to continue towards perfection.  The Apostle Paul said "we press on toward perfection" (Philippians 3:14), not that we have obtained it.

Enter this morning at church and a sister in Christ walks up to me encouraging me I am not alone in my struggles.  That none of us are perfect.  We all struggle with the flesh and we all make mistakes, but the difference is we keep pressing forward.  Sinners quit.  They throw their lives away lost in the enslavement of their selfish desires.  Christians keep moving forward even when we fall down.

She only knew I was struggling because I made one post on our church app.  Otherwise, her saying the exact same words that God had spoken to me through the movie and Brennan Manning's message was not planned.  She said what God wanted me to hear.

Then the worship team sang songs about "come as you are", and how much Jesus loves us.  Our pastor sang "Jesus Loves Me, This I Know", which was the exact same song the movie "Ragamuffin" featured.  How are these types of coincidences possible?  They're not.  God is planning life.  He is speaking through His people.

Then the Pastor delivers a message God placed upon his heart and guess what?  It tied everything in my life this past week together.  From me struggling and not letting go of certain things I need to, to surrendering and trusting in God.  God spoke through the Pastor to remind me once more what God had been dealing within for the last week or two.  I did not call my Pastor to let him know what I was struggling with.  We did not organize this.  God speaks through us; He moves through us.

These are not coincidences.  In fact, how can one say they cannot believe in something unseen like God and yet you put your trust in coincidences, luck-these things that are unseen and not proven.  Yet God has proven Himself time and time again.  Yet we are blinded by the darkness of this age, too wrapped up in our own logic to see Him.

God's timing is perfect.  He placed in my life different circumstances to help me to understand that God loves me just as I am.  God loves me through my struggles and mistakes.  He loves me and it is out of that love that I want to be better.  It is out of that love, and God's proof of His love that makes me want to forsake my flesh; makes me want to make better choices.  Not because God is forcing me to but rather because I love Him and I want to press forward towards the mark that Jesus Christ has paid for.

Today, those who are nonbelievers will read this and continue to say, "I don't get it."

You're right.  You don't, and you won't unless you understand what true love it.  True love is that a perfect, righteous, and holy being God became flesh and died upon the cross for our sins.  True love is that the Son of God died for us, the imperfect us.  He didn't wait until we had achieved perfection.  God didn't wait until we had met legalistic requirements established in a Board of Trustees meeting creating church by-laws for membership.  God sent His one and only Son because He loves us as we are and He wants us to be with Him.

Today I pray your veil will be removed and you will be able to find the same God I have found-the God of love, the God peace, the God of my heart.